Seeing the Irony
Monday, April 20, 2026
Seeing the Irony
I never thought I would get to the point where I could think that anything about my relationship with Brian would be the least bit funny or, better yet, ironic, but I see now how ridiculous it all was and is. I came to this conclusion when I recently stumbled upon a social media post featuring him being interviewed at a birding event he was at. He and his wife do educational programs, including flight demonstrations with Brian’s birds of prey. He had a Red-tailed Hawk on his glove while he rambled on in a rush. He never once made eye contact with the interviewer or the audience. He talked at them, not to them. His social awkwardness was apparent as he rambled on erratically in run-on monotone sentences, with no affect. When she came over to help him make way for the next presenter, he was only too happy to have her take over. She is his opposite and works the crowd like a master. She rattles on and on, making eye contact with the audience and flitting around, driving home whatever point she is trying to make in her nasally voice while raising her eyebrows for emphasis. Brian is obviously proud that she has “zoo experience,” has worked as a vet assistant, and was the Playboy Bunny Animal handler for a while, so her experiences and status elevate his by association. When he introduces her, it sounds more like a job interview than a marriage. And seeing this performance, it is clear why.
What I didn’t know about them is that they have a long, sordid history, which I learned by accident. Brian has known his wife for many years. He was friends with her boyfriend first. This boyfriend was a scientist and falconer from the area where Brian grew up, but was now living in Malibu. In those days, Brian, the boyfriend, and the wife headed up a smuggling ring that would go to Australia and steal eggs from wild and rare cockatoos, bring them back to the states, rear them, and sell them as captive-bred. It was a highly lucrative business that netted millions of dollars, violated the Lacy Act, and threatened the cockatoo population in Australia. It also landed them in prison for some substantial time. The boyfriend went for five years, Brian three and a half, and wifey just over three. It became almost a laughingstock as so many people flocked to smuggle that they were tripping over each other in the outback.
What are the odds that these two end up married after all these years and are now running around in matching shirts doing bird shows? Is that not ironic? They go to prison for smuggling rare birds and are now out there pretending to care about the very animals they exploited and mistreated. We are talking about sociopathic criminals here. I lived with Brian for seven years, and he always prided himself on getting away with things that were illegal and immoral. He did whatever he wanted whenever he wanted, and nothing was off limits. And when I reached out for closure in the end, I was met with unkindness from her that was confusing to me. What threat was I to her? She was a pink sister who turned out to be a phony and a hypocrite. The smear campaign was as shocking as the discard. But as I learned later, this is normal behavior for narcissists.
As I watched this video, I realized how funny, phony, and ridiculous they look. It seems so chaotic to me, the dance they do for the audience, that they need to do. Their narcissism drives this need they both have to be noticed and relevant. I also realize that he has given up and has turned his life over to her. She is his savior and runs the show. She has become mommy, nurse, slave, front person, and baby man keeper. Not my job anymore, and a love story for the ages looks like a tabloid special to me. It is ironic, yes, but it’s more than that; it’s downright funny. I guess the couple that smuggles and goes to prison together are meant to be together. UH, birds of a feather? Sorry, couldn’t help it.